Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan sat back in the green swivel chair and contemplated her Abbū, Imām Muħammad Ħasan, across her favorite desk.
Her Abbū had a dream to be the Mustafa Kemal Atatürk of entire Islamic World.
But whereas Mustafa Kemal Atatürk was practical, her Abbū, Imām Muħammad Ħasan, was utopian more than practical.
Imām Muħammad Ħasan could not understand that the Musalmīn were never democratic practically except when Ħuzūr sallallāhu ålayhi wa sallam and Kħulfa-e-Rāshidīn were alive.
Maybe Abū Sufyān had embraced Islam ultimately sincerely after the victory of Mecca.
Yet, his ‘crown prince’, his Walī Åhad, Ħazrat Muåāwiyah bin Abū Sufyān, never forgot he was the crown prince of Mecca before Ħuzūr sallallāhu ålayhi wa sallam conquered Mecca.
He was never democratic, nor as sincere to Islam as Ħazrat Kħālid bin Walīd, Saifullah, razī Allāhu Tålā ånahu.
Her Abbū, Imām Muħammad Ħasan, was almost always in a state of high enthusiasm.
He had congratulated his daughter profusely, abundantly.
She had fulfilled his dream in Saudi Arabia.
Even her Ammī, Nafīsah Salmān, had ignored that Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan had revenged her for betraying her father.
Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan never listened to her Ammī.
Nafīsah Salmān always tried to explain to her daughter,
“Your Abbū is a bloody terrorist. He is a munāfiq, a Pseudo Musalmān. I punished him for his munāfiqat, his pseudo Īmān.”
Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan laughed sarcastically.
“And I punished you for your insincerity to my Abbū as his wife. I can please Durgesh more, sexually, than you can. I’ve successfully replaced you in his life.”
“Because you are thirty two years younger than Durgesh?” Nafīsah Salmān, her Ammī, had smiled cunningly.
Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan realized once again she owed her cunningness to her Ammī, Nafīsah Salmān, she detested so much.
Her Abbū, Imām Muħammad Ħasan, wasn’t cunning at all.
He was a utopian idealist Musalmān.
Al Tawaħīd Al Muħammad Al Ħasan was Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan’s utmost close sister.
Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan was happy that Tawaħīd Bājī was too not less cunning than herself or their Ammī, Nafīsah Salmān.
What a great Panjvaqtah Namāzī Saåūdī Årab Wahābī Musalmān female body her Ammī, Nafīsah Salmān, had.
Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan could not deny her own immense Musalmān beauty was due to her Ammī’s incredible eternal Musalmān beauty.
Nafīsah Salmān knew very well how to maintain her magical magnificent figure.
Al Tawaħīd Al Muħammad Al Ħasan had congratulated her younger sister too.
She had happily recounted the details of her airplane trip down from Ved Nagar, accompanied by the Secret Service commando who had shown at Ålīgarh Muslim University a week ago.
Al Tawaħīd Al Muħammad Al Ħasan had reported proudly that every passenger aboard was absorbed in a newspaper or weekly magazine filled with pictures of Al Sadar Al Jamhūriyat Al Årabiyat, Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan.
Al Tawaħīd Al Muħammad Al Ħasan had recounted the excitement of her ride in the President House limousine too, of the photographers who had surrounded her outside the Al Ajm lobby, of her rescue.
Momentarily muted by her first visit to the Ashvinātam Ummat-e-Muslimah Office, Al Tawaħīd Al Muħammad Al Ħasan had then wanted to know everything about it.
Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan happily led her Tawaħīd Bājī on a tour of the Presidential House, Ashvinātam Ummat-e-Muslimah Manzil, pointing out the historical curiosities about which Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan had learned and dreamed of ever since she understood why Durgesh was so loved and so admired by even his enemies.
Even Durgesh’s enemies wanted to be what Durgesh was today.
Yet they only wanted to be Durgesh.
It was their fantasy only.
They only fantasized to be Durgesh.
They never were serious about it.
Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan was serious about it.
She studied gravely, deeply, profoundly, what Durgesh always cared for and his opponents never did, even though they were always jealous of Durgesh.
Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan always watched Durgesh fucking her eternally beautiful Ammī, Nafīsah Salmān.
She wanted to know what her Abbū, Imām Muħammad Ħasan, lacked and Durgesh doesn’t that her Ammī, Nafīsah Salmān, left her Abbū for Durgesh.
She found Durgesh loved animal wild sex similarly as her Ammī, Nafīsah Salmān, did.
Her Abbū hated animal wild sex.
It was the first reason her eternally beautiful Ammī, Nafīsah Salmān, preferred Durgesh on her Abbū, Imām Muħammad Ħasan.
When having sex with each other, her eternally beautiful Ammī, Nafīsah Salmān, and Durgesh, both were not even human.
They were entirely unashamed beasts, surrendered to their ever wild animal lust, without caring anything else whatsoever.
Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan could not believe her otherwise ever sophisticated Ammī, Nafīsah Salmān, was so horniest the female beast.
Durgesh was so horniest male beast.
Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan decided to have Durgesh for herself too.
Yes, Durgesh was thirty two years elder to Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan.
Ħuzūr sallallāhu ålayhi wa sallam were also even far more elder than Ummil Mominīn, Ħazrat Åāyeshah Siddīqah, razī Allāhu Tålā ånahā.
She was surprised by my firm tone, but always welcomed our conversations.
“Åāliyah Kamāluddīn, we need to talk!”
For over ten year now it was just Åāliyah Kamāluddīn, her fifty five years old Hindu friend of her husband, Durgesh, and her nineteen-year old daughter Sādiyah Raħīm.
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn was near forty now, a homebody, and still in pleasing shape.
Her tresses were raven black, only her hair-dresser knew for sure… Her ample bosom hadn’t sagged even a little.
Even forty years couldn’t do that.
Her skin showed no signs of age.
She could still turn heads if she wanted to.
I had not seen my friend’s wife, Åāliyah Kamāluddīn, in anything form-flattering since the old man, my friend, Muħammad Raħīm, was around.
At home she always wore a bra under her frumpy, baggy sweats.
Mostly green, or on a daring day, for her, I sometimes caught a glimpse of a black strap and once even, a red bra.
Though I thought that might have been Sādiyah Raħīm’s on a laundry day.
An occasional glimpse of the beautiful Musalmān cleavage showed the wear of four decades on a full exquisite female Musalmān figure.
Her chest never revealed even some wrinkles and the natural effects of gravity on a well-endowed Musalmān woman.
Her legs were nicely muscled, as she had never been taught to drive, so biking and walking had served her well.
And either by design or comfort, she often wore very skimpy, tight shorts in her garden or for her daily runs or rides.
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn sometimes got wolf-calls and whistles from bold Hindus and she could truly catch my eye when she leaned over the handle bars and peddled swiftly.
The pumping motion often made me wish that her swaying Musalmān breasts would one day spill over the top of her almost transparent bra.
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn had been a middle-management secretary back in the day.
Schlepping, filing and pleasing a typical ladder-climbing idiot of a boss.
She worked overtime and through lunch, and ordered her own flowers for “appreciation day.”
After closing a big deal, the boss would escort her to a hotel lounge for a single appletini and offer a snide jab that her career would advance quicker if she spent more time under my desk than in front of it.
The crude sexual remarks elicited only a smirk.
She sometimes daydreamed that if my remarks were sincere or even clever, she would drag me into the elevator and up to one of the luxury suites on the upper floors.
She once joked that they could settle a sexual harassment suit out of court.
Her boss merely smiled, drained his glass and scanned the room for younger talent.
For the past ten years, Åāliyah Kamāluddīn had become a stay at home Ammī for her children.
She cooked, cleaned and cared for kids while nearly abandoning her own identity.
I was, beside the Mayor of Ved Nagar, a web designer and programmer.
I spent countless hours online and on porn sites to know how to make and use them positively.
I dreamed-up various positive scenarios on my laptop, with every fantasy woman from Xena to the Flying Nun.
After trolling internet spank-sites into the early morning, I would “run one off” and then hunker down for another day.
I had never been a jock.
Though my upscale, early life had afforded me rich-man privileges. I surfed the Pacific off the shore of their Malibu beach house.
I took riding lessons and belonged to a posh club.
This however was long ago.
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn’s wealthy husband had left them with nothing but bills.
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn won custody of a beachfront home they could not afford and platinum cards that served only as anchors.
In came the dot.com.
Boom and soon, my dexterity with a mouse came as a saving grace.
I was soon able to pay down the family debt and transfer Sādiyah Raħīm from a community college to a “big-name” Pac-10 school.
Their life was suddenly golden and the family adored me.
I was classically handsome in this “Hollywood” town.
With dark hair and warm black eyes I always got an offer or a look, every now and then.
When I sat my friend’s wife, Åāliyah Kamāluddīn, down for our “talk”, I had already steeled my nerves with a little juice and had worked my diabolical scheme online for weeks.
In my mind, all my money went into this home and to Sādiyah Raħīm and Åāliyah Kamāluddīn.
I believed I could easily be on my own, living the high-life.
Instead, every day was a round-up of shopping-lists, utility bills, school work and more.
The beach-bunnies and bachelor-pad were nowhere to be found and it was time someone paid.
“Åāliyah Kamāluddīn,” I began, “it’s time for some changes. You and Sādiyah Raħīm have to start doing more around here.”
“Well of course Durgesh, you are the breadwinner and we would do anything to help out. What can I do for you, dear? Anything we can do to help, you just ask.” This was the only way Åāliyah Kamāluddīn knew how to answer.
She sat pleasantly on the couch, in shorts and a thin blouse.
Dark, full black locks framed her face and lay gently on her shoulders.
Her family was European Årabian and they all inherited the shiny, black hair and olive complexion.
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn seldom wore makeup at home, and that only lipstick and liner to high-light her big, doey eyes.
She was content to remain invisible and anonymous.
Her hands were folded delicately in her lap, her long fingers intertwined.
Light-green shorts riding up her thighs and stretching tightly across her wide hips.
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn’s tanned legs showed her toned calves and thick quads.
And her bare legs were crossed at the ankles with one canvas sandal precariously balanced on the toes of her right foot.
These Åāliyah Kamāluddīn-Durgesh talks always lifted her spirits.
She sat her teacup on the inlaid coffee table and scooted to the edge of the sofa.
She looked directly into my eyes.
It was good to see me taking charge of a situation and she was pleased to see me assert myself more.
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn had taken on the role of the facilitator and always tried to ease family friction.
No sense beating around the bush.
“Åāliyah Kamāluddīn, frankly I’m horny. I’m not getting enough sex in this home, and I want to make some changes, here.”
She was surprised at that, naturally.
And coming from her husband’s ever best friend, even if I was the ever infamous Anant Muslimātchod Hindu.
She wasn’t sure what I was trying to say.
“Åāliyah Kamāluddīn,” I tried again, “I’m going to change the dynamics here.”
She was thoroughly confused, shifting her position, and taking on a look of concern.
She tried her best to discern my intent.
“Do you mean you need more privacy, or that you want to have more beautiful Musalmān girlfriends over? Would you like us to stay out of the way on certain nights? You want to have sex. That’s fine, you’re a Hindu, I understand.”
This just tended to infuriate me.
And now anger was increasing moreover.
“Yes, sex, that’s it. In this house. And whenever I want it. And it starts tonight!”
My face reddening as I rose and paced the room ominously.
My ego grew with each repressed desire.
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn was flustered and not quite comprehending.
“Durgesh, it’s late, Sādiyah Raħīm’s staying with a friend and I can make myself scarce. Let me gather a few things and I’ll ride over to my friend, Lailā’s.”
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn rose to leave and as she tried to pass, I grabbed her wrist and said,
“You don’t get it, do you? I want sex. I want it, now. And I want it from you.” I blurted it out and liked the way it sounded.
Then I roughly pulled her back onto the couch.
She was just catching up with my last words, ..
“I want it from you.”
Her beautiful dark, brown eyes grew wide. “Durgesh, are you crazy? I’m your friend’s wife, Åāliyah Kamāluddīn, your Bhābhījān!”
Beads of sweat appeared at her temples and her heart-rate soared.
I sat on top of her to plant her in her place.
Her head started thrashing wildly, her ebon locks clinging to her face and loose strands flying in all directions.
Her strong gams kicked at me as her sandals flew across the living room.
Her grunts of exertion were working like a tonic on my conception of things and she felt my Hindu manhood begin to swell.
The thrill of the hunt was always better than the trophy!
I pushed her sweaty, disheveled excellent Panjvaqtah Namāzī ardent Musalmān body into the cushions and figured my next move.
It was now or never and I had already gone too far to stop.
Her protests increased verbally and physically as her resistance started.
Allah, Allah, Nooooooooooooooo!
Yes, she had lost her mind while flirting with Durgesh.
But not sex!
She teased Durgesh, seduced Durgesh, but it was only a tease.
She wasn’t prepared even to have sex with the ever infamous Anant Muslimātchod Hindu.
She shrieked in my face and tried to heave me off her.
I was sitting on her belly, my left hand clasping both her wrists and my right hand violently yanking her shorts down her legs.
“You grab my Uncut Hindu Penis every now and then, don’t you? You play with it and suck it every night when you think it’s safe and I’m sound asleep. You even undress me yourself then, undress yourself too, straddle me and fuck me almost entire night. Don’t you?”
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn was dumbfounded.
“You, you were never asleep? You, you were always wide-awake?”
“What do you think? Aren’t you one of the utmost beautiful Musalmān wives my Musalmān friends have and always crazy for me? You are already enjoying the ultimate pleasure with me, while I always suppress my feelings for you.”
“I, I’m sorry. I was fed up, frustrated actually.”
“What the hell do you mean, Åāliyah Kamāluddīn?”
“I needed such videos to show to my husband.”
I was startled.
“He always refuses me to straddle him. He doesn’t have sex with me properly. I boasted to him that even you let me straddle yourself. He didn’t believe and laughed at me.”
“Your ever righteous Musalmān friend challenged me to make our videos and show them to him, if you really allow me to straddle you.”
“And you did it? Are you crazy?”
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn blazed at me suddenly,
“Shut up, you damn fool. Every Musalmān houselady that’s beautiful, is crazy for youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu! Not me aloneeeeeeeeeeeeeee!”*
I watched her incredulously.
“So, you prepared our videos yourself and gave him?”
“It wasn’t necessary.” Åāliyah Kamāluddīn said disinterested, “I only had to agree. He himself made entire arrangements.”
“And do you know what he is doing with those videos of us? He is using them to make our adult movies. You are now a wonderful, one of the utmost successful porn stars, with me.”
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn wasn’t startled.
She wasn’t dumbfounded.
Instead, she smiled cunningly.
“And my husband himself is doing it?”
“That’s what I wanted.” Åāliyah Kamāluddīn smiled triumphantly.
“I told him he is a pimp, not any sophisticated person. And now he himself has proved it.”
“Are you crazy? He is selling our porn videos.”
“He isn’t alone,”
“What do you mean?”
“Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan has made Pseudo Musalmīn either to surrender to their cuckolding to their beautiful Musalmān womankind and you, or leave Modern Democratic Årabia and live the vagabond life of a refugee.”
“That’s the exact punishment the terrorists, criminal and criminal minded Pseudo Musalmīn deserve. Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan has decided even not let them unite anywhere. Their unity has always proved harmful to humanity.”
“Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan is right, but…”
Åāliyah Kamāluddīn mused.
“Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan is always right.”
“Not always.” I said disapprovingly, “No one is always right except Eīshān Param Brahm Paramātmā, Allah, God. Åāliyah Kamāluddīn, you are a Musalmān lady. You can’t appreciate anyone beyond a limit. Alhamdulillah. Y’ ék ittamu sŧuhi. Mā chidanyasvishansat sakhāyo mā rishañyat.”*
Damn Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan!
She has spread so many white lies about my unique legendary sexual prowess that almost entire Musalmān houseladies believed if they hadn’t have sex with me ever, they haven’t enjoyed even their life optimum as a woman.
My Uncut Hindu Penis wasn’t the biggest one, neither the monster as Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan and her ever cunning, ever shrewdest, ever smart, ever preplanned untrue Young Musalmān lady Brigade spread the white lie everywhere.
“Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan,” I gritted my teeth, “Stop spreading white lies about my ever incredible unique legendary sexual prowess.”
“Am I harming you, Anant Muslimātchod Hindu Piyā?” Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan cooed straddling me aggressively as usual.
“Not me, and don’t try to bribe me by straddling me aggressively every when I want to talk with you on some grave matter.”
“It’s bribery?” Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan looked into my eyes seductively, “It isn’t my ever exclusive wifely love for my ever sexiest Hindu husband?”
“Why do you and your ever obedient Young Musalmān lady Brigade spread white lies about my Uncut Hindu Penis? You and your entire Young Musalmān lady Brigade know with your own constant experiences that I don’t have the biggest penis…”
“Who the hell is interested in the damn biggest penis? They want only to experience the thrill of having sex with the utmost sexiest Hindu.”
“Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan,”
“A large number of them want to have only the ultimate intimacy with you, to feel the pride of it their entire life. They damn care about the truthfulness of the fantastic stories we spread of your ever miraculous sexual prowess. They live in dreams. They want to keep living in dreams. They never want to come out of it. That’s the tragedy of not only us womankind, but of us entire humankind as well.”
“Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan is right, Durgesh.” Imāmzādi Ħumayrah Qāzī smiled gravely at me.
4. On History
6. On Hinduism
7. On Islam
Jāgīrdār Muħammad Jalāluddīn
Allah ghārat karé in firangiyon ko.
Sirf is wajah sé ki voh us vaqt Hindustān sé maħfūz bāhar nikal sakén, Hindu aur Musalmān aapas mein lađté rahén, aur firangiyon sé pichhlé ék sau nabbé sālon kā inteqām lé sakné kā unhén kħayāl tak na aa saké, firangiyon né Pakistan kī buniyād rakh dī thī.
Nūrjahān kā maslah yah thā ki voh Uncut Hindu Lund kī dīwānī thī.
Lekin aisā Hindu to is ghar mein sirf ék hai.
Ammījān kā Hindu secretary.
Amarnāth Vedic pachās saal kā ho chukā hai.
Lékin Nūrjahān kī tamām sahéliyān abhī bhī Amarnāth Vedic kī dhuāndhār ghanghor Chudāī kī tårīf karté nahīn thaktīn.
“Hindu Pakistan mein bas ab yahī ék kaam ŧhīk se kar sakté hain.” Farzānah Aurangzeb ne apni bāīn aankh dabāī thī. “Yahān Pakistan mein rahnā hai to hum Musalmān ħasīnāon ko kħush rakhén. Hamāré béwaqūf mardon se sirf hum hi unhén bachā saktī hain.”
Nūrjahān ko shak thā ki Ammījān Amarnāth Vedic se chudvātī hain.
Farzānah Aurangzeb kā bhī yahī kħayāl thā.
“Secretary, hell. Phūphījān Amarnāth Vedic se chudvātī hain. Tere Abbū kā to ab khađā bhī nahīn hotā. Samjhī?”
Nūrjahān ne ék ghūnsā jamāyā thā Farzānah Aurangzeb kī pusht par.
“Achchhā? Tujhé kaisé målūm?”
“Aré, main kħud sun chukī apné kānon sé. Tūné nahīn sunā kabhī? Ghar mein rahtī hai yā jhakh mārtī hai?”
“Ab to yahī mannā pađégā ki jhakh hī mārtī hūn. Tūné kab sun liyā? Kahān sun liyā?”
“Pichhlī martabah main rukī thī na? Tab raat ko paanī pīné uŧhī thī. Térī Ammī, mérī Phūphījān, téré Abbū ko dānŧ rahī thī thīn: ‘Kħabardār jo ab phir kabhī mujhé hāth lagāyā. Kitnī dér se koshish kar rahī hūn. Khađā tak to hotā nahīn ab tumhārā’.”
Nūrjahān hans pađī.
“Wallah, sach kah rahī hai?”
“Aur kyā jhūŧh kahūngī tujh se?”
“Allah Allah,” Nūrjahān hanstī huī bolī, “mazā aa gayā, yaar. Kambakħt, bađé mauqé se uŧhtī hai paanī pīné.”
“Ilāhī, ab kyā main koī jān būjhkar uŧhī thī us vaqt?” Farzānah Aurangzeb ħairān hotī huī bolī.”
“Achchhā Achchhā, ab zyādah drama mat kar. Yah batā, Shyām Manohar ko paŧāyā?”
“Téré driver ko?”
“Méré nahīn, Abbū ke driver ko.”
“Nahīn ré, voh to bahut dartā hai téré Abbū se. Kah rahā thā, Jalāluddīn Sāħab ko målūm ho gayā to mérī naukrī to gaī hī gaī.”
“Tū to ulloo kī paŧŧhī hai. Ussé kahnā thā, ék dhakké kā ék rupyah.”
“Allah,” Farzānah Aurangzeb dam bakħud rah gaī, “yah baat to mere zahan mein aaī hi nahīn.”
“Bhūsā jo bharā hai téré dimāgh mein.”*
Farzānah Aurangzeb kī baat kī tasdīq usī raat ho gaī.
Nūrjahān Jalāluddīn jān būjhkar ‘Kħātūn-e-Jannat’ pađhtī rahī us raat dér tak.
Ammījān, Begam Zāhidah Ůsmān, ké bedroom mein jān būjhkar jhānktī rahī Nūrjahān Jalāluddīn rah rahkar.
Raat ké do bajé uské sabr kā natījah usko milā.
Natījah vahī thā jiskā Nūrjahān Jalāluddīn aur Farzānah Aurangzeb donon ko shubhah thā.
Nūrjahān Jalāluddīn né jab is martabah apnī Ammījān, Begam Zāhidah Ůsmān, ké bedroom mein jhānkā to usné apnī Ammījān ké secretary, Amarnāth Vedic ko bhī Ammījān ké bedroom mein pāyā.
Årab Burdāfaroshon ne Yazīd Malåūn se aisé Mullāon aur Maulaviyon ko jān būjhkar taraqqī dene kī shart rakhī thī, jo Pseudo Musalmīn mardon ko Pseudo Islāmiyāt mein itnā uljhā dén ki apnī Panjvaqtah Namāzī shauharparast Musalmān bīwiyon tak kī jinsī zarūriyāt pūrī karnā unhén najāsat lagné lag jāyé.
Aisī Panjvaqtah Namāzī shauharparast Musalmān bīwiyon ko bahkānā aur unhén capable aur powerful Hinduon ke bistaron tak pahunchānā Pseudo Musalmīn Årab Burdāfaroshon ke liyé kitnā āsān thā yah Nūrjahān Jalāluddīn bahut achchhī taraħ samajhtī thī.
Aur uské badlé Hinduon se munh māngī qīmat vasūl karnā bhī.
Ħazrat Muåāwiyahrzu kabhī yah ħaqīqat nahīn samajh pāyé ki Ħuzūrs kī Taħrīk-e- Islamī kħwāh Ħazrat Muåāwiyahrzu aur unké kħāndān ke liyé kitnī hī nuqsāndéh kyon na rahī ho, tamām åālam-e-insānī ke liyé Ħuzūrs kī Taħrīk-e- Islamī kitnī zarūrī thī.
Aaj jis Jamhūriyat ko tamām åālam-e-maghribī falāħ-e-insāniyat ke liyé az-e-ħad zarūrī qarār détā hai, us Jamhūriyat kī buniyād kħwāh Hinduon ne hī kyon na rakhī ho, 1400 Saal qabl usé nisf duniyā tak pahunchāné kā kaam Ħuzūrs kī isī Taħrīk-e- Islamī né hi kiyā thā.
Nūrjahān Jalāluddīn bahut burī taraħ uttéjit ho chukī thī.
Andar kħwābgāh mein, bedroom mein Amarnāth Vedic aur Nūrjahān Jalāluddīn kī Ammī. Bégum Zāhidah Ůsmān kiss kar rahé thé aur yahān Nūrjahān Jalāluddīn kī angulī kab kħud bakħud uskī Pakistani Sunni Musalmān Choot mein ghus gaī thī, iskā usko ĭlm tak nahīn ho pāyā thā.
Lékin issé farq kyā pađtā thā?
Agar usé ĭlm ho bhī jātā to kyā Nūrjahān Jalāluddīn apnī angulī apnī Choot mein ghuséđné sé baaz aa jātī?
Sawāl hi paidah nahīn hotā.
Ab mérī jān, Durgesh darling, méré Hindu Piyā, Hindu Al Buůūlatul Muslimāt, hum Musalmān ħasīnāon ké Hindu Kħasam, Hindu husband of us Musalmān Beauties! Tumhāré Uncut Hindu Lund kī jagah bhalā mérī yah måmūlī sī nāzuk unglī kabhī le saktī hai?
Please aa jāo na.
Please, dékho andar Amarnāth Vedic uncle Ammījān ko chodné kabhī ké aa chuké.
Hey, jhūŧh boltā hai Kambakħt.
Béwaqūf banātā hai.
Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan sach kahtī hai.
Uncut Hindu Lund kā koi jawāb nahīn.
‘Mérī muddat kī namāzon aur duåāon kā silā,
Méré Hindu Piyā tum mérī hasīn taqdīr ho.’
Amarnāth Vedic jāntā thā ki Bégum Zāhidah Ůsmān kitnī pyāsī thī.
Phir jab Allah Allah karké Muħammad Jalāluddīn yah ħaqīqat samjhā bhī, to jo samjhautā ħālāt sé usné kiyā voh yah thā ki Muħammad Jalāluddīn ne apnī béħad hasīn intehāī shauharparast Panjvaqtah Namāzī Pakistani Sunni Musalmān bīwī kī béħad hasīn béħad dilkash Pakistani Sunni Musalmān Choot chūmnī aur chāŧnī shurū kar dī.
Bégum Zāhidah Ůsmān nihāl ho gaī.
Voh Muħammad Jalāluddīn par laŧŧū ho gaī.
Kuchh vaqt ké liyé Bégum Zāhidah Ůsmān yah bilkul bhūl gaī ki jo oral sex voh apné kaŧŧar Panjvaqtah Namāzī Pakistani Sunni Musalmān shauhar, Muħammad Jalāluddīn, sé chāhtī thī voh darasal yah nahīn thā ki voh uskī Pakistani Sunni Musalmān Choot chūmé aur chāŧé.
Muħammad Jalāluddīn dam bakħud rah gayā.
“You must be crazy, Amarnāth Vedic.”
“Janāb, aap kħwāh kħud bhūl jāyén ki aapné mujh par kitnā bađā aħsān kiyā hai, main yah kabhī nahīn bhūl saktā.”
“Pāgal ho tum. Voh aħsān mainé tum par nahīn, tumné mujh par kiyā hai.”
“Yah Pakistan hai.”
“Hum Hindu yahān dūsré darjé ké shahrī, second class citizen hain.”
Kyā kħūb pahchānā thā is shakħs ko Muħammad Jalāluddīn né.
Hindu vāqaåī yāron ké yār hoté hain agar unké sāth koi chaal na chalī jāyé, koī game na khélā jāyé.
Aur tārīkħ gawāh hai ki Musalmīn kabhī is wajah se nuqsān mein nahīn rahé.
Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn Hindu Lund Muslim Choot International Club ké chakkar mein aesī phansī huī thī ki agar Amarnāth Vedic Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn sé nikāħ na kartā to Allah hī bahtar jāntā hai, Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn kis kis Hindu sé na chudvā chukī hotī.
Kiskī Ammī né sawā kilo sonŧh khāī thī ki voh apnī bīviyon ko khulé åām nangī ghūmtī dékh saké?
Aur kiskī Ammī né sawā kilo sonŧh khāī thī ki voh yah jānté būjhté Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn se nikāħ kartā ki Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn Hindu Lund Muslim Choot International Club kī ék béħad aham rukn hai?
Ékdam sāf alfāz mein inkār kar diyā thā Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn né.
“Bhāījān, āpkī chhoŧī bahan ab bāligh ho chukī hai. Āp is taraħ us par apnī Tānāshāhī nahīn chalā sakté.”
“Hargiz nahīn, Bhāījān, hargiz nahīn.” Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn nihāyat hī sard lahjé mein bolī thī. “Āpko dékhté hī mujhé yah kħūb achchhī taraħ yād aa gayā hai ki āpné marħūm Abbū kī is baat par purzor mukħālifat kī thī ki voh mujhé åālā tålīm ħāsil karné ké liyé Harvard University bhéjén. Abbū āpkī taraħ Pseudo Musalmān nahīn thé.”
“Jāgīrdār Muħammad Jalāluddīn, the oppressor the tyrant.”
“Jo shakħs apnī sagī chhoŧī bahan tak ko na bakħshtā ho, voh apnī riåāyah ko kyā bakħshégā. Pakistan aap jaisé zālim Tānāshāh Jāgīrdāron kī wajah sé hī aaj tamām åālam mein badnām hai.”
“Apnā apnā kħayāl hai. Baharħāl, hum tumhén Hindu Lund Muslim Choot International Club jākar hamārī tauhīn kar sakné kī ijāzat hargiz nahīn dé sakté.”
“Yahī to āpkī ghalatfahmī hai Bhāījān, ki Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn PhD āpkī ijāzat kī muħtāj hai.”
“Tum humsé baghāwat karnā chāhtī ho?” Muħammad Jalāluddīn kī ānkhén surkħ ho uŧhīn.*
Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn tanz āméz muskurahaŧ ké sāth bolī.
“Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan se ŧakrā sakné kī auqāt hai Pakistan ké is ‘ahamtarīn’(?) Jāgīrdār Muħammad Jalāluddīn kī? Main Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan kī ék ahamtarīn Taħrīk-e- Islamī Hindu Lund Muslim Choot International Club kī ék ahamtarīn rukn hūn. Aur Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan aaj Modern DemocraticÅrabia kī Sadar ban chukī hai. President of USA Jacqueline Lincoln tak aaj Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan kī wajah sé President of USA banī hai.”
“Tum mujhé darānā chāhtī ho?”
“Méré pyāré Bhāījān,” Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn nihāyat hī mīŧhī aur intehāī surīlī āvāz mein kūkī, “Main āpko āpkī auqāt yād dilā rahī hūn. Pakistan kā ék måmūlī sā Jāgīrdār to kyā, samūchā Pakistan milkar bhī na Modern DemocraticÅrabia kā muqāblā kar saktā, na Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan kā, na Jacqueline Lincoln kā, aur na hī Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan aur Jacqueline Lincoln ké Hindu Kħasam, Durgesh kā. Āyā kuchh mijāz-e-sharīf mein?”
“Naåīmah Muħammad Ħasan aur Jacqueline Lincoln kā Hindu Kħasam, Durgesh, sirf in donon åzīmushshān niswānī shakħsiyāt kā hi Kħasam hai, yā mérī pyārī sagī chhoŧī bahan, Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn, bhī Durgesh ké bémisāl Uncut Hindu Lund ké mazé lé chukī hain?”
“Who the hell are you to ask me? Main bāligh hūn, kħud Mukħtār hūn, aur mérī achchhāī aur burāī kā faislah kħud kħūb achchhī taraħ kar saktī hūn.”
“Hindu Lund Muslim Choot International Club kī ék ahamtarīn rukn bankar?”
Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn ne apnā sar fakħr sé taan liyā,
“Hindu Lund Muslim Choot International Club ék muqaddas Taħrīk-e- Islamī hai. Iské naam par jākar kisī ghalatfahmī mein pađéngé, to aesī munh kī khāyéngé ki pachhtā sakné tak kā mauqā nasīb nahīn ho sakégā. Samjhé?”*
Jāgīrdār Muħammad Jalāluddīn ké munh sé béakħtiyār niklā,
Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn khilkhilākar hans pađī.
Jāgīrdār Muħammad Jalāluddīn ħalaq phāđkar chīkħā.
“Kħabardār jo ab phir kabhī us nangī ghūmné wālī, feminist, Årab Musalmān laundiyā ko Kħātūn-e-Jannatrza kahā. Zubān khīnch lūngā main tumhārī. Yah na tumhārī Harvard University hai aur na hī tumhāré Hindu Kħasam, Durgesh, kā Ved Nagar. Yah Pakistan hai, samjhīn?”
Jāgīrdār Muħammad Jalāluddīn né ék tīkhī nigāh apnī us balā kī hasīn Panjvaqtah Namāzī Pakistani Sunni Musalmān chhoŧī bahan par dālī jo is lahjé mein ussé baat kar rahī thī jaisé Bénazīr Ålī kā qātil kħud Jāgīrdār Muħammad Jalāluddīn ho, terrorists nahīn.
Durgesh kī tamām åuratén isī taraħ over confident hotī thien.
Sirf Durgesh se chudvātī thī Kambakħt.
Lékin impression aesā diyā thā usné apné bađé bhāī ko jān būjhkar jaisé Hindu Lund Muslim Choot International Club mein voh kaī Hinduon ké sath khélné khāné wālī modern, balki ultramodern, Pakistani Sunni Musalmān kabūtarī ho.
Yahī wajah thī ki Jāgīrdār Muħammad Jalāluddīn dhokah khā gayā thā.
Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn One Man Woman thī.
“Aesī bahut sī Musalmān ħasīnāyén hain Bhāījān, jinhén aap Pseudo Musalmīn Namak Ħarām samajhté hain, lékin darħaqīqat Namak Ħarām voh Musalmān ħasīnāyén nahīn hain. Namak Ħarām darħaqīqat aap Pseudo Musalmīn hī hain.”
“Kħāmosh, badtamīz.” Jāgīrdār Muħammad Jalāluddīn burī taraħ dahāđā.
Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn is taraħ muskurāī jaisé usko apné oppressor tyrant Jāgīrdār bađé Bhāī se iské ålāvā aur koī ummīd kabhī rahī hī na ho.
Pakistan kā nihāyat hī backward khudgharz kħudparast Jāgīrdārānah nizām iské ålāvā aur kaisī shakħsiyāt paidah kar saktā thā?
“Durust farmāyā aapné.” Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn muskurāī, “Hum åālā tålīmyāftah Musalmān lađkiyān aur Musalmān åuratén āpko badtamīz hī lagéngī, Bhāījān. Lékin ħaqīqat yah hai ki hum åālā tålīmyāftah Musalmān lađkiyān aur Musalmān åuratén na to badtamīz hain, aur na hī Namak Ħarām. Namak Ħarāmī kī shurūåāt Ummat-e-Muslimah mein darasal Abu Sufyān aur Ħazrat Muåāwiyahrzu né kī thī.”
Voh phaŧī phaŧī ānkhon sé apnī chhoŧī bahan Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn kī jānib dékh rahā thā.
Allah, méré Allah, méré Maulah,
Usné kabhī kħwāb mein bhī nahīn sochā thā ki uské kħāndān kī koī fard kabhī itnā bhī gir saktī hai.
Iran haméshah hāth pair mārtā rahā.
Lékin kāmyāb kabhī nahīn ho pāyā.
Aur yahān uskī apnī sagī chhoŧī bahan, Nigār Sultānah Humāyūn…
4. On History
6. On Hinduism
7. On Islam