Gotrbhid Mahā Bhārat
‘Jāti Pānti Poochhé Nahin Koī,
Hari ko bhajé so Hari kā Hoī’
1/18: Ādi Parv
Shankar Sahajpāl thought to himself as he drove into his driveway.
‘What is she doing here?’
Almās Sheikħ’s hot new friend Fātimah Ħusain was there and his strong Bachhalyā Dick began to stir.
Shankar Sahajpāl never thought himself a Traditional Paurāñik Brāhmañ.
Arjun Sharmā was shocked.
He looked horrified at Shankar Sahajpāl.
He could not believe his own ears.
As far as he knew Shankar Sahajpāl, Shankar Sahajpāl was a proud Traditional Paurāñik Brāhmañ.
He openly criticized it.
“Our political philosophy is rotten, but we are practical.” he used to say.
Arjun Sharmā looked at Shankar Sahajpāl, perplexed.
“I’m unable to follow you properly, Sir. You are too fast even for me.” Arjun Sharmā smiled at Shankar Sahajpāl respectfully.
Shankar Sahajpāl smiled at Arjun Sharmā patronizingly.
“Who are the most successful politicians of the entire history of humankind, Arjun Sharmā?”
“Of course, the Bachhalyās, sir. No doubt at all.”
“They defeated you Brāhmañs successfully. Didn’t they?” Shankar Sahajpāl was still smiling.
Arjun Sharmā was unable to understand what Shankar Sahajpāl was leading him to.
Shankar Sahajpāl continued smiling.
“The Bachhalyās were so successful that they made Brāhmañs ineffective practically. The Brāhmañs were so disgraced by the then Bachhalyās that even Lord Parashurām could not find another option except to kill them 21 times, to do justice with the then Brāhmañs. The Bachhalyās were despised heavily and eventually, ultimately, sent to the Shoodr Category from their original BrahmXatiy’ category.”
Arjun Sharmā listened attentively.
“It took at least 21 cycles of almost everlasting, ever repetitive, Brāhmkalps, to bring Bachhalyās to their practical senses and to see his point. Even the greatest Brāhmañ reformist could not do it before at least 21 cycles of almost everlasting, ever repetitive, Brāhmkalps.” Shankar Sahajpāl smiled gravely.
Arjun Sharmā said patiently.
“You are right, sir. But you are still too fast for me. I still can’t follow you optimum.”
Shankar Sahajpāl smiled ironically.
“Niyog my foot. Your mother Kuntī Chaturvédī was so sexy that she became pregnant even while she was unmarried.”
“Well, the womankind says Durgesh is absolutely irresistible.” Arjun Sharmā said gravely, “All the extraordinary Beauties, irrespective of their religion, caste, creed, faith or beliefs; are crazy for Durgesh. And, pardon me, sir. Do you really believe, even in these modern times, that premarital and extramarital sex is unethical?”
“Certainly not, Arjun, certainly not.” Shankar Sahajpāl smiled compromisingly, “I too respect sexual freedom. I too respect consensual premarital and consensual extramarital sex. It is a personal matter between two consenting adults.”
“Then why did you say my mother Kuntī Chaturvédī was so sexy that she became pregnant even while she was unmarried? She dreamt of Durgesh as the other Beauties did. She dreamt of Durgesh as the other Beauties do. Nothing abnormal she did ever. And when she found her dream lover Durgesh was available to her, she offered herself to Durgesh. What’s wrong in it?”
“Arjun, I am not criticizing your mother, Kuntī Chaturvédī, for her premarital sex. It was her own personal privilege.”
“Exactly, sir, doubtlessly. Exactly.”
“I’m telling something else.” Shankar Sahajpāl said patiently.
He knew Yudhishŧhir Sharmā, Bhīmvipr Sharmā, Arjun Sharmā, Nakul Sharmā and Sahdév Sharmā — all the five Sharmā brothers loved and respected their mother Kuntī Chaturvédī very much.
She was now the Chief Queen of Sharmā Brahm Indrprasth Creations.
Even her mother, Imāmzādī Al Qur’an Al Wahāb, was living with her.
Despite countless efforts of Suyodhan Sharmā and his infamous maternal uncle, Sheikħ Al Ůmer Al Aħmad Al Zabīr, the Sharmā Brahm Hastināpur Creations could never succeed in defeating Sharmā Brahm Indrprasth Creations.
Imāmzādī Al Qur’an Al Wahāb laughed at their frantic, desperate, yet still continuous, unsuccessful, political and diplomatic attempts.
“Kuntī, your Traditional Paurāñik Brāhmañ Jyéshŧh, Dhr’trāshŧr Sharmā, is now perhaps killing himself for his decision to divide his ancestral empire into two parts.”
Mahārānī Kuntī Chaturvédī smiled at her still extremely beautiful, dowager Ammījān, Imāmzādī Al Qur’an Al Wahāb.
“They are trying their best to take advantage of the time cycle of original Mahābhārat. They forget, it’s not Dvāpar now.”
“You are right, my child.” Imāmzādī Al Qur’an Al Wahāb smiled gravely, sophisticatedly, “It’s Shāshvat Satyug now. It’s the first cycle of Almost Everlasting Brāhmkalps.”
Mahārānī Kuntī Chaturvédī looked incredulously at her Traditional Paurāñik Brāhmañ husband, Pāndu Sharmā.
Suyodhan Sharmā and his ever infamous maternal uncle, Sheikħ Al Ůmer Al Aħmad Al Zabīr, never called him by his actual name, Pāndu Sharmā.
They always called him ‘Gāndū Sharmā’ to humiliate him intensely.
Pāndu Sharmā laughed at it.
“Kuntī darling, they can’t win me ever. So what else can they do except cursing me and allotting me bad, humiliating, nick name?”
Mahārānī Kuntī Chaturvédī looked at Pāndu Sharmā gravely.
She knew Pāndu Sharmā was not a gay.
He fucked them openly on hyper 3Ds.
He was even very popular among sexlovers with his ‘Kām Sūtr Manchans’, his ‘Kām Sūtr Exhibitions’, with his extremely beautiful Musalmān Beloveds.
He was never a gay.
Yet, Suyodhan Sharmā and his ever infamous maternal uncle, Sheikħ Al Ůmer Al Aħmad Al Zabīr, never called him by his actual name, Pāndu Sharmā.
They always called him ‘Gāndū Sharmā’ to humiliate him intensely.
None could help it.
Sheikħ Al Ůmer Al Aħmad Al Zabīr was constantly trying to infuriate Pāndu Sharmā.
He wanted Pāndu Sharmā to attack on his elder brother Dhr’trāshŧr Sharmā.
Only this was the reason, he managed to compel Dhr’trāshŧr Sharmā, to divide his ancestral empire.
Pāndu Sharmā always boasted that none can separate him from his elder brother.
Sheikħ Al Ůmer Al Aħmad Al Zabīr wanted to prove him wrong.
“Elder brother, my foot.”Sheikħ Al Ůmer Al Aħmad Al Zabīr shouted, “Dūlhā Bhāī, Pāndu Sharmā is not even your real brother. His mother is Mahārānī Ambālikā Joshī, not your mother Mahārānī Ambikā Joshī.”
“They are real sisters. Moreover our father is also the same, Vichitr Vīrý Sharmā.”
“Vichitr Vīrý Sharmā was never interested in Brāhmañ Beauties, neither he is still now.” Sheikħ Al Ůmer Al Aħmad Al Zabīr again said contemptuously, “He has never even touched your mother Mahārānī Ambikā Joshī, neither your aunt Mahārānī Ambālikā Joshī. And why should he, Jījū Mahārāj? Countless Wahābī Musalmān Beauties, Countless Sunni Musalmān Beauties, Countless Shiå Musalmān Beauties, and Countless Aħmadī Musalmān Beauties are always available to him. Why should then he waste his royal time with Utmost Evercold Brāhmañ Beauties? The everhottest Muslim Beauties were, and still are, always available to him, and to every capable Hindu like him. Your Grandmother Mahārānī Satyavatī Pandit requested Durgesh to fuck your mother Mahārānī Ambikā Joshī, and your aunt Mahārānī Ambālikā Joshī. The real father of both of you Sharmā brothers is a Bachhalyā sex maniac, Durgesh. Please do understand.”
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